There is no exact recipe or life hack for this one, folks.

Loss and grief are no joke. Not even gonna to try to sugarcoat it. Here’s how to bounce back.. But know that it will also be different for everyone. Trust the process. Trust that you will bounce back.

1.     Grieve deeply. 

This may seem obvious. But anyone who has been through several intense losses in a very short amount of time, can tell you that this is no joke. The people around you may not get it. If they don’t, give yourself this gift. 

Give yourself the gift of time. 

There is a good chance the bulk of the process will take longer than you hope. There is a good chance the intensity of many different emotions may bubble up from time to time down the line. 

No one can tell you the right way to do it. No one can pressure you because they have not a clue unless they’ve been through the exact same situation. No one can tell you how much time it will take. 

Let go of everything if you have to. But take the time. Just take it.

2.     Find neutral support. Seek out a few professionals from various backgrounds using different modalities.

 Ask me about this.

3.     Create a daily schedule.

Take the morning to use the modalities that you’ve found that best work for you and stick to them every single day. This will pave the way for the day. These morning practices may not “work” every day. But stick with them.

Depending on your unique situation this will look different for everyone, but might include a combination of the following:

• Sleeping. Quality sleep aids repair on too many levels to name. Reach out for my go-to quick list on how to sleep WELL.

• Journaling. Important to put pen to paper. This connects to our right brain which is where our creative and intentional centers lie. Commit to journaling for 30 days. Ask me what to write about.

• Movement. Move your body. This stimulates feel-good neurochemicals in the brain lifting us out of any depression, anxiety, fear and trepidation on moving forward. Run. Walk. Bike. Cardio classes. Burn it all off.

• Breathwork. This offers a similar effect. Although though I’ve used breathwork extensively and regularly, I found it highly effective in the intense processing of compounded trauma. I can guide you through some basics you can try on your own in a safe manner at home.

• Create a To Do List:  Work. Life. Details. 

A lot of basic details can get lost for a lot of people without even going through intense loss! Create a list. I can help you with how I’ve run mine for the past six years. Scratching even the smallest items off of a list can help us feel like we are accomplishing something (anything!) once we are feeling up to it. Gradually, as we begin to tackle a little bit more each day, we see progress. With progression, we always feel better.

4. Go easy on yourself. 

This is a tough one. Good chance the people around you may not be patient, so you must claim this most essential component for yourself. After all, we just want to be back to normal, too. 

When we are in this place, we may not want to see anyone, talk to anyone, or be around anyone. Why would we when most people completely avoid loss and grief?

Be gentle with yourself. This can be the hardest thing in the world. I personally hired neutral support in several different people. Plus employed copious amounts of free content online.

By all means, refer to this article to  “Know that it is not you.” 

Not sure where to start? Let’s design your path to bouncing back.

The sun will set each day.

The nights can be long.

Listen to podcasts, listen to professionals speak on the endless channels offering free content online, teach yourself something new, make art, read, stare out of the window, take long hot Epson salt baths, make nourishing foods, hydrate well, exercise a lot plus any other self-care that works for you. Maybe even watch a movie in the middle of the day. 

This is a time when we should be able to depend on those around us within several realms if need be. In a quick Google search one can find out how to support people coping with trauma, loss and grief HERE. 

Find a way to take time out. Support yourself more than ever before. The sun will rise again offering another day that may be challenging. Know that it also offers the promise of being just a little bit brighter. Drown out any judgement and critique from others and take care of you. The End.

“Everyone grieves in their own time.”

 Find this phrase entirely accurate yet completely confusing? It is. And it does not help. Action is required to handle what is emotionally unfinished due to death, estrangement or both.

P.S. Ultimately, being seen and heard is key. Tell me your story. Here is MINE.